Thursday, October 24, 2013

Coming to terms


Even though I still wake myself up clenching my teeth at night, this morning I felt more at peace.

I walked in the brisk autumn morning, watched a gorgeous sunrise, and despite the coffee am still feeling more calm and relaxed than I have in days.

I meant to pray last night--and I fell alseep before I could, but I am one of those people that talk to God during the day, thank Him for small things, and even though I am not a devoted church goer any longer--still have faith. Even in my darkest hour, when I feel that God has forsaken me, I still ask for strength and guidance from Him to guide me through those places to the good things on the other side.

I don't feel like I have been forsaken recently--I just feel like I've had a turn of negativity that is preventing me from moving forward in so many aspects of my life. I feel like there is something holding me back from being the best me I can be.

My goal is to break through these barriers. I need to figure out what I want and how I can get it. I need to form a plan of attack, and then surge forward and break through. Oh, and to trust in God, to give him my trials and tribulations so that I can be unburdened...and to learn the patience that I need for this next chapter to unfold.

Things are going to be better. I know it.

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